Rahul Commits Blooper, Calls PM "Opposition Leader"

[scholseys]

Next PM, he will show genocidal Modi whos the boss.

 

[Ragnar]

COMIC: When Rahul Gandhi met Xi Jinping | The UnReal Times

 

[JanjaWeed]

Here is that gem...

 

[The Huskar]

 

[RKO]

arey rahul... horlicks pina bhulgaya kya???
I wonder what he will do on his first night if he get married (which is unlikely)!!!

 

[RKO]

Derek: My first question is to Rahul Gandhi.
( Rahul Gandhi rolls up his sleeves to get ready
to answer) Who invented the computer?
Rahul ( almost instantly): Ha…That’s easy.
Rajiv Gandhi. Pitroda uncle keeps telling me
he brought computers to India.
Derek: I’m afraid I can’t give that to you,
Rahul. The question passes to Modi bhai.
Modi (wipes his brow and takes a sip of
water ): I got this…Charles… ( thinking hard )
Cabbage…no, wait… Charles Xavier.
Derek: That’s not quite correct. Nitishji, it’s
your turn now.
Nitish: Hahah… arre bhai , what was that?
Sweating, drinking water… are these signs of a
future PM? And not knowing the difference
between Charles Xavier and Cabbage! Former
is a character in X-men, latter is a vegetable…
Derek: Don’t bullshit, boss. What’s the correct
answer?
Nitish: Wait, wait. Let me finish analyzing the
body language of he whose name I won’t take.
He was shivering when the question was
passed to him and..
Derek: You are out of time. The correct answer
is Charles Babbage. I’m afraid none of you get
it. Next question to Narendrabhai. Who did
Alexander defeat in the battle of Hydaspes?
Modi: What does knowing this have to do with
governing the country, man? Anyway, I think I
got it. Some Punjabi chap…..Sardar Cyrus?
Derek: Man, you need to pay more attention to
details when you read. The question passes to
Rahul.
Rahul: Let me ask you the same question –
who did Alexander defeat in that battle?
Derek: WTF? You are the participant, not me.
Rahul: That’s ok. Try, try again.
Derek: Ok, I take it you have no clue. Nitishji,
your turn.
Nitish: Arre Derekwa, when Alexander never
even came into Bihar, why should I care who
he defeated in the Battle of Hydaspes?
Derek: ARGHHH….All three of you still tied at
nought. Correct answer is Porus or
Purushottama. Ok, final question to Nitishji.
What was Chandragupta’s caste?
Nitish (pumping his fist) : YESSSS…this is my
area of expertise. From mother’s side he was
an EBC belonging to Kevat subcaste and from
dad’s side, he was a Kshatriya
Derek: Er….I don’t think that’s the right
answer. Rahul ji, you can take a shot.
Rahul: Bhaiyya , what was his escape velocity
to reach the top? Was it Jupiter’s or Venus’s?
Only if you answer that can I answer your
question.
Derek: You are crazy, man. What does escape
velocity have to do with all this?
Rahul: Arre bhaiyya , A Dalit needs Jupiter’s
escape velocity to escape from his social trap.
Similarly, an OBC needs Saturn’s escape
velocity. So tell me what escape velocity did
Chandragupta have and I’ll tell you what his
caste was.
Derek: Bhaiyaa back at you. I have no clue.
And stop asking me questions. Modibhai, you
want to take a shot?
Modi (by now looking zonked out) : I have no
fricking clue, dude. Anyway, wild guess –
Gupta caste.
Derek (breaks into a broad smile) : Hahah…
that’s funny.. (abruptly drops his smile) No.
From his mother’s side, he is believed to have
been a Shudra.
Nitish: Arre bhai , what kind of answer is that?
Shudra? There are Shudras and then ati-
Shudras, just like Dalits and Mahadalits. And
within Shudras, there are Kevats, Karvaits,
Godhis, Taantis…
Derek (cutting him short): Quizmaster’s
answer is final. Anyway, a good quizzer has a
superficial knowledge of everything without
super specialization in anything. I’m afraid
none of you are Prime Ministerial material.
Modiji, your inattention to details is
disturbing, Rahul baba, you are too whacked
out, and Nitishji, you are just weird.
“Then who is Prime Ministerial material?” all
three PM aspirants shout in unison.
“Derek O’ Brien, of course,” say Sagarika Ghose
and Karan Thapar, appearing on the stage.
“As a quiz master who asks all the right
questions, he has the right capabilities to lead
the nation. Pertie says his general knowledge
of Indian history is second to none,” says
Karan Thapar. “Indeed, he’s the
Macaulayputra’s Maculayputra, the genuine
article,” Sagarika Ghose adds. “My vote goes
to him.”
“Yessss.. I am Prime Ministerial material, I
have the power,” Derek begins to gloat. But
the faces of people in front of him have turned
white.
“What’s wrong? Come, join me in celebrating,”
he urges, as he breaks into a jig.
“Pssst…look behind you,” Sagarika whispers.
Derek gingerly turns around and nearly jumps
out of his skin when he finds the gaunt face of
Mamata Banerjee starring back at him.
“Ei ki, Derek? What was the commotion
about?”
“Er…Sagarika just said I was Prime Ministerial
material, Didi,” Derek answers, voice quaking
with fear.
“And what did you say in return?” Mamata
asks, glowering at Derek.
“Er… I was about to say that I will be a Prime
Minister reporting to you just as Dr.
Manmohan Singh reports to Sonia Gandhi,”
Derek answers.
“Correct answer, Derek. I like it very much,”
Mamata says, clapping her hands in glee.
Karan and Sagarika look at each other and
nod in acknowledgement. Derek heaves a sigh
of relief.